You may ask what the point of this post is, and it may come off as a little unstructured, but I don’t mind; structure gets a little tedious and boring every now and then.
For years I have always had the desire to see more of the world, with a bubbling interest to go and see America. I’m fascinated by the place. The contrasting states terrains, the contrasting people, the music scenes, the food, the general aesthetic of many places in America, as well as so much more draws me in all too strongly. Wanderlust is something that I imagine most people feel in their lives. It’s natural to move around, it’s natural to move from place to place, and it’s natural to want to do that in the 21st Century when there’s so much opportunity to do so.
For the last year or so, my yearning to travel to America has grown so strong; it is now my life goal, and the thing that I think about the most.Of course it won’t take my whole life to save up the money to go, maybe a matter of months, however it is my primary objective. It gives me motivation, and something to aspire to. My desire to travel intertwines with my love of writing poetry and fiction. I want to explore these places that staple themselves in my mind, and I want to extract as much as I can from my experience away, so I can hopefully concoct something worthwhile, in terms of my writing. In addition, I possess a mindset in which becomes convoluted at times, even for myself. A mixture of frustration at being burrowed so far into my own country and regular life, of seeing the same things every single day. The fact that meaningless tasks and an unfulfilling job consume a considerable amount of my time. The overwhelming desire to just go and ‘do’ something that I can look back on with fond memories. The happiness that flows through me when I think about the possibility of travelling. The sadness that consumes me when I realize how expensive and difficult it can be to get out to a place as far away and vast as America. The strong feeling that the petty things that create and fill a void in my life aren’t enough, and that there’s more to life. This mixture just clouds my mind, but it leads me to ‘know’ that I need to go and do this.
People seem so scared of someone wanting to go and do something. On so many occasions, I’ve seen myself or others been dragged down by people when they opened up about their dreams and aspirations. It just saddens me that people don’t set their heights higher sometimes. I’ve by no means done anything extraordinary or incredibly different and interesting in my life, but I’ve realized my goal and now I want to set out to achieve it. If when I travel, I find a place that I think I’d like to live in, then I’d certainly want to move out and live there in the future also. I don’t want children in my life time, I’m not interested in settling down with a mortgage forever. I’d be happy with a small apartment that’s nice enough to live in, and I’d prefer to save up my money so I can go and do things that I am actually interested in. I of course understand that we need to work and earn money, however I just find it bizarre that people don’t create time to do the things that they truly want to do in life as much as they should. I say this as a 19 year old who hasn’t achieved all too much in his life time. Someone who’s very imaginative and ambitious, but hasn’t gone through with things as much as I should have. As the cheesy and often poorly used saying goes ” You Only Live Once.” And while that saying is often ridiculed;at the end of the day it’s perfectly true. And I just want to do something that screams my understanding of having one life. I want to make life worthwhile. I don’t want to sound obnoxious; I understand that going to new places isn’t an interest everybody possesses. But for me personally, just staying in the same country forever, repeating the same tasks, working the same job, with the same people forever just doesn’t seem like enough. I guess I’m just getting a crazy feeling that I just need to get away, and I know that eventually I will do. Things take time and that gives me motivation; something that I don’t usually have. I just want to break the mold, and the man-made structure of the life that we live. I want to take some risks, meet new people, make mistakes and find joy, have no money, be scared, be happy… All in new countries across the world. I want to be, itinerant.